But anyway, it was actually two pedestrians, a mid twenties male and a little girl. The male was in uniform... and contrary to most women... I HATE A MAN IN UNIFORM. Well, I at least hate a man in an army uniform...
NOW, before I go on some rant and get labeled a terrorist and a secret Al Queda spy or something... My grandpa was in the korean war or something. All I know is he is a vet... and i'm not even going on an ANTI war brigade... but I am about to rage with the keyboard...
I literally do not understand why military personnel like... wear their uniforms all the time. I understand sacrificing your life for your country is exceptionally noble... but isn't going into burning buildings pretty noble too? or being a surgeon and paying for an excessive amount of education just so one day you can save people's lives also like... PRETTY NOBLE? but you don't see firemen wearing their outfits outside the station on their days off, nor do surgeons wear their blood stained scrubs to walk their daughter to school... It just really bothers me.... Like it's great and thanks for being all patriotic, but what's with the uni? I literally don't understand.
So they eventually crossed, and I proceeded to the next light...
It took all of 30 minutes for this overweight Mexican kid on a scooter to scoot between the white lines... The red hand was up about 1/3 of the way into the endeavor. I'm not making fun of people for their weight, but its like what happened to bikes... or you know... foot power? the scootie just wasn't working out.
This is all coming from the girl that up until JUNIOR year occasionally rode her razor scooter to softball practice with a gigantic softball bag slung oh so casually over one shoulder... polyester pants and high socks all the way down foothill... Why didn't my mom tell me I was such a freaking loser... it is straight up freaking miraculous I've ever had any friends...
Anyway, maybe I should have moved to the Dena sooner because clearly here scooting is an acceptable practice... none of the other cars honked angrily at the poor kid scooting like I did... (okay, I didn't actually honk... but I seriously really wanted to.)
gasp. wait. did she say she moved? haha, yes, I did move again. I've had people with knowledge of various components of my life trying to figure out where I am now located. Pretty funny. I'm pretty sure at this point I could say I'm living in the Dursley's stair closet and people would believe me... I mean, if harry potter hadn't already done it...
but with every move, there are things you miss about your ex-housey.
For example, I really miss my pet lizard that lived with me in the TROSE.
kidding.
anyone who has talked to me in the past month has probably heard the horrid tales of the demon lizard that took over my previous residence. and for those of you who haven't...here is a quick break down of the six inch reptile that ruined my life.... or you know, just scared the living shit out of me and kept me out of my own bed for almost a week...
he was spotted right before spring break started... I didn't sleep there for four days... I had a lizard hunter come and try and find the bastard... and after moving all the furniture and no appearance by the devilish creature, I decided it was safe to return... because EVERY ONE FREAKING TOLD ME THAT IT HAD PROBABLY LEFT... THAT LIZARDS DON'T LINGER... if any one ever tells you this... ignore them. they are not lizard whisperers like you may think and do not know jack about lizard habits.
so fast forward to a week ago... the same little guy scampers out of a closet one morning.... luckily my mom was there to witness his existence (people thought I was going insane and few believed such a lizard even was real) and shove the guy in a corner and trap him with some random posters... any way, long story short, the lizard became rampant and vivacious and began to cause some serious physiological issues... so.... let's just say.... I TRIED TO DROWN IT IN BLEACH AND STUN IT IN THE EYES WITH HAIR SPRAY. I know... I know..... SOOOO INHUMANE... THAT LIZARD IS SOMEONE'S LIKE MOM OR SOMETHING... well if it's someone's mom then why the hell is it living in my closet, why isn't it with its family... yeah PETA that's what I thought... so let me wrap up this lizard story before people label me internet scum and a waste of their time... but what happened was... I thought the lizard was dead... but there was no way me or my mom was scooting out some dead thing (euw) so I called one of my fearless bytches, GFRAZ. She came to scoot it, she gave it two hard sweeps, and the guy CAME BACK TO LIFE AND RAN TO THE HALLWAY NEAR MY BEDROOM. which really just goes to show.... Karma is a BITCH if you are. Eventually the lizard was finally released back into the wild streets of montrose after it hid under a plastic bag near the door.... I will never forget that lizard. that crazy MF.
I will also miss a few of the local spots... Like Rocky Cola for instance... The only "diner" I really ever go to... But I think I only go there because in movies whenever criminals or people like evading the law or whatever ALWAYS meet at diners while on the run... or at least eat there and usually throw a wad of money on the table before literally running out the door... I've been waiting my whole life to witness some kind of dramatic diner "dine and dash" by criminals.... Diners are just sketchy... I figure if I sit in one long enough Danny Ocean is likely to come and ask me to be part of his crew, recently renamed Ocean's 14 (since it now would include me....).... Who am I kidding if George Clooney was in visual distance from me I would have a heart attack on the spot and never live to tell the tale. I mean, especially if I'm spending that much time at diners waiting for it to happen. Hello milk shakes/fries up the wahoooozooolle.
ANYWAY.... my itunes is open and is being totally random and GWEN STEFANI just came on and now I'm so add thinking about how epic she is for saying "take a chance you stupid hoe" in her song over and over again. what a bad ass.
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